What stinks more than gorilla poop?

No money for schools stinks.

It was bad enough when my kid's teacher said she couldn't replace the classroom pencil sharpener, because there was no money.

It was even worse when there weren't enough textbooks for each student to have one, even in class (forget taking one home to study), and the kid next to my kid refused to share and bullied him instead.

Last year there was the paper shortage. No handouts or copies. So students had to waste time copying typed information on a piece of paper and THEN do their homework.

Teacher benefits are being cut or reduced, including health insurance.

Surely it couldn't get worse...

I just got a letter from the school district saying that "due to significant financial challenges facing the district, it will be necessary to make reductions in the transportation services provided by the district." In other words...no school bus for my elementary-age son. Noone within two miles of a school can ride the bus. And to top it off, no late bus for middle school or high school either. Which means if a child needs tutoring or has an after-school activity or club, they have to find their own transportation. The state doesn't cover it. Now the district can't.

I'll tell you what is causing "financial challenges" in our district. A football stadium. Oh, they call it "The Berry Center". My teacher friend and I call it "the Taj Mahal" of Cy-Fair. It was built in 2006 when more schools were being built in the district and the powers that be discovered that oh gee...we won't be able to play all the football games in the current stadium...whatever shall we do? The answer was to build the Berry center. They justified it by saying it could also be used for staff development and graduations, and that the cost of renting facilities for graduation was too high. So they built the Berry Center to the tune of 80 MILLION dollars. And they did it up big. Lots of lovely architectural columns and spacious halls. Huge. So huge that the electricity bill is $35,000 a MONTH. For a fancy football stadium. You can't tell me it costs more than 12 x 35 grand to rent a facility for graduation for our high schools. And can't staff development meetings be held in auditoriums and school classrooms? The real reason is football.

Then they wonder why we have no money for paper and textbooks and busses.

I don't think I'd have such a problem with spending so much money on football, if it were a sport that students could use their whole lives, like running or tennis or ballroom dancing, or even golf. Hey, we could have a district golf course built! Or a huge professional sized restaurant kitchen so we can teach them all how to cook. Or a school laundromat so high school students could learn how to wash clothes. Now THAT would be useful, and something EVERYBODY needs.

So my question is... will the football team (a small percentage of the school population) still have expensive uniforms supplied and get bussed to their long distance events, when kindergarteners have to walk 2 miles to school every single day? Will unwed high school mothers still get bussed to school with their infants, in a bus that's mostly empty, when there's no paper or pencil sharpeners? Oh, and my friend who drives a bus says that last semester, there was a special ed kid that got driven to the mall regularly. All alone in her very OWN bus. It was for her "social development". PLEASE. Can't her PARENTS take her to the mall after school? In their CAR?

Oh, and the latest news...next year they're taking away our homestead exemptions. I wonder what we'll get for that.

Our government is doing such a wonderful job funding education... Hey I have a GREAT IDEA.... Let's let them take over the health care system too!!

Not.

Here's the recipe for this week, requested by one of my seminary students. It's inexpensive, so you can buy more gas and paper. And yummy, so you can forget how much you're paying in taxes to cool the Berry Center.

Mary calls these "Gorilla Poop". I call them No-bake cookies.

Gorilla Poop
(No-bake cookies)

2 cups granulated sugar
4 T cocoa powder
1 stick butter
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup peanut butter
3 cups quick oats
1 1/2 tsp vanilla

1. Combine sugar, cocoa, butter, and milk.
2. Bring to rolling boil, stirring constantly. Boil one minute.
3. Remove from heat. Add peanut butter immediately, and once mixed thoroughly, add vanilla.
4. Stir in oats. Blob onto waxed paper. Let cool before eating.